Teach Them How to Give and Receive Compliments Gracefully

Ever tried to compliment your kid and they just stare at you like you’ve asked them to recite the quadratic formula? Or watched them blurt out 'I like your face' to a stranger? Welcome to the wild world of teaching compliments—where awkwardness reigns and genuine sweetness occasionally peeks through. If you’re ready to turn those 'uh, thanks?' moments into actual confidence-boosting exchanges (without anyone turning into a compliment-hoarding dragon), this is for you.

Learning to give and receive compliments builds self-esteem, social confidence, and empathy in kids. It actually lights up the brain’s reward centers (hello, dopamine!) and helps wire those little neurons for positive social interactions. For parents, it’s a mini-boost to see your child not only survive but thrive in the wilds of playground politics.

How to do it

  • Model the behavior by complimenting your child and others in front of them. Aim to be specific and genuine with your praise for extra impact.

  • Practice at home using silly role-plays. For example, say things like, "I love how you brushed your teeth with only a little toothpaste on the ceiling!" This helps make the process fun and low-pressure.

  • Teach your child to respond to praise with a simple "thank you," even if they feel shy. This builds confidence and good manners.

  • Remind your child that it’s okay to feel awkward when giving or receiving compliments—everyone experiences this sometimes.

  • Celebrate their attempts at giving compliments, no matter how small or quirky. Even if their first compliment is, "Your socks are… interesting," acknowledge their effort and encourage them to keep trying.

Key Tips:

  • Be consistent in modeling and practicing compliments.
  • Keep the atmosphere light and playful to reduce pressure.
  • Focus on effort and improvement, not perfection.
  • Encourage your child to notice positive things about others in everyday situations.

After dinner, when everyone is still at the table.

Pull one compliment from the jar and read it to someone at the table.
Do a goofy family cheer or high-five after each round.
Create a 'compliment jar' with slips of paper and a few starter compliments.

When your child receives a compliment from anyone (family, friend, cashier).

Prompt them to say 'thank you, that makes me happy.'
Give a secret thumbs-up or whisper 'nailed it!' to your child.
Teach your child a simple phrase like 'thank you, that makes me happy.'

When you notice your child’s friend or sibling does something kind.

Whisper to your child, 'Want to tell them you liked what they did?'
Share a proud grin or do a little happy dance together after they try.
Make a list of specific, kind compliments together (e.g., 'I like how you shared your toy').